what gets me through

it's Sunday.

  i'm trying.  it's been hard, so hard without my beautiful boy.  i'm doing the best i can, somehow days keep passing and i keep moving with each one that passes.

somehow.

mostly because of this sweet girl.

she keeps me going, gives me purpose.  she helps me more than she knows, just by being mine.

i've been designing my sweet boy's headstone and that has been nice, doing something for my beautiful boy.  but it's also hard now that i'm done with my part because it seems so final, now that that's done.....now what?

i know i have other things that will fill my time---i'm planning to go back to school, and i've been helping in aubrey's classroom----but it's such a sad feeling to think that these future plans don't include my sweet boy.  i know i must keep moving along with life, but it doesn't stop me from feeling like some days i just don't want to!  because moving along means doing it without him, without my son.

but then, i know that he is never not with me.  i am never not with him.  he is always with me, and i do feel him.  i really do.  and i also know that with every day of life that i live, i am that much closer to really being with him again.

and then we have forever.

together.

and that gets me through.  it gets me through those moments when i feel like i can't breathe.  those moments where i miss him so much i can feel the hurt in every ounce of my being.  those moments where i just don't know how i'll survive to the next.

my faith and my knowledge of Heavenly Father's great plan for us gets me through those moments.

and hugs from this girl.

she makes my heart feel happy.

happy Sunday from us.

<3